hey guyssss! here i am laying down on my bed in front my laptop, typing away some words into a full on sentence which i hope does make sense since it is like 10 minutes past 12 in the midnight. yeah, i put my blog post on schedule because i am THAT dedicated. i don't know why but i have the feeling that i have the need to talk about my favourite songs.
okay here's a thing. somehow, i find that one of the hardest question or one of a question with an infinite answer is "what is your favourite song?" and most of the time, i will just tell them about my current favourite song. it is impossible for me to answer an instant i have been questioned that question. i think i might have to sit down for a few days and write down all the songs that i love. then, i will be coming up to you with what-it-seems-like-a-harry-potter-and-the-order-of-the-phoenix but it is not. it is just as thick as that and when you read it, you will find that it is actually a list of my favourite songs.
however, in this post i won't be only talking about the songs that i love. but these are the songs that actually speaks for me. and you will find that most of the songs are actually instrumental and it is accurate. because sometimes, not even words can describe what do you feel inside, right? the songs that i will be giving out mostly have the lyrics that i found that even myself, can barely decipher thoroughly into it. instead, it will just end up with me thinking about that sing even more, trying to find and understand the lyrics, or what the story behind it. long story short, these are the songs that the lyrics or just the musics haunt me for ever.
and now that i have the song listed on my brain, i just realised that almost all of the songs are the only song that i heard and loved by a singer/band that i am not that obsessed with. (does this make sense?) and being the band obsessed as i am, i find that it is hard for me to choose only ONE SONG that i love from that band. that is just impossible. so none of the song that will be listed are from the bands or singer that i am obsessed with.
this song is just pure perfection. i find that this song gives me a roller coaster emotion. it starts of slow and in the middle it just blew me away. this is the song that gets me to dance although i am not a dancer; even terrible at it. it just hits me in the right place. oohhh, and fun fact, this song is in the movie Insidious. i was actually trying to find the song that Renee was singing with the piano and found this one instead. it is in the scene where they have moved into a new house and found somebody changing the song to Tiptoe Through The Tulips and dancing to it. it was the song before that.
well, this one, also was a main theme from a movie Requiem for a Dream. the story behind this happened recently actually. i was looking at the synthesia thing on youtube, because i was obsessed with piano instrumental at the moment. and then, i saw in the recommended section but it was entitled Requiem of a Dream and i was attracted by the title. and when the song started, i knew by that moment, i was screwed. just like Nuvole Bianche, the song starts of slow and in the middle of it, it just caused a riot in my heart. and there was this one time when i was listening to the full original version of it, not the piano instrumental version, when i was in the mall with my family. and in the piano instrumental, it wasn't a full version. so when i started to listen to the full original version of it, in the mall, i got chills and i was just starstrucked by it. and i just had to watch the movie which i find it quite interesting. not my favourite but it is a nice movie. i ended up in tears which i always do, so no surprise.
okay, this one actually i don't know what's the title because i found it on dance moms. it just happened to be the song from my most favourite group routine.; runaway/children with guns. when i rewatch the sow, i was mad because in the show they didn't really use the title children with guns and they didn't include the newscast. and i am super annoyed because the dance routine is just amazing and the story behind it just ahhhh. YOU MUST WATCH IT. i just love it so much i don't know why. but i am going to leave a video here.
okay, i just gotta save the best instrumental for the last. i discovered this song from the game Life is Strange that i watched Jacksepticeye playing. it is just amazing. i love the game, i love the soundtrack especially this one. because they used this song when Max listened to the voice mail that Nathan sent to her. and it just breaks me inside. it still does. that is like the part that all part of me shattered into pieces. HEARTBREAKING AF.
and here goes the song that is not instrumental lol
this song was also from dance moms. when i listened to this song while watching the dance routine. all i'm thing about is WHAT IS THIS ALL ABOUT???? i nearly cry every time i watch the dance routine. the lyrics is just simple but there is a whole lot meaning to it and i cannot interpret it which is disappointing for me. but all in all, i feel like the singer, is so underrated. and i have heard most of the song by them and it is actually good??? but i don't think anybody will know who they are which is very sad because they have like very good musics. thank God for dance moms. oh and also, the song was also from my favourite dance routine. so i'm gonna leave the video here for you to watch.
here is another song that i am grateful that i have mobile data and downloaded shazam because i heard this song was playing in the mall, so i just had to Shazam it. and i looked like an idiot because the volume was very low so it is hard to Shazam, then i had to raise my phone up in the air so it could detect the song. luckily, it did its job. i would be miserable if i can't find it. but to be exact, i only heard the music, not the lyrics. but when i search for the lyrics, i was like DAMN GIRL WHAT IS THISSSS. the lyrics to it just opened up my eyes and heart and mind.
i found this song from the awesomenesstv series with amanda steele on it called guidance. and in the second episode of it, if i am not mistaken, the counsellor interviewed a guy, i don't know what their relationship were. but this song started to play when they guy saw the girl dancing. when i listened to the lyrics thoroughly, i just... felt connected to it. it is so damn accurate??? but the lyrics are pretty self-explanatory. but the meaning just got me like... that explains me in a love life at that moment? aha. don't judge me.
the story about how i discover this song is pretty darn cute actually. i follow this poetry account (@wasitw0rtit) on instagram. and one day, the owner decided to make like a playlist based on each letter of our name. all we had to do was leave our name and our favourite genre. and she dm-ed me a picture of my name and the songs, which i didn't thought she would do because DAMN there was a lot of people who commented on that picture. so yeah, and one of which was this song that got me attached to it. the lyrics are very poetic, and i don't know. it is just beautiful. this song is just beautiful. i feel calm whenever listen to this song.
i didn't actually just found this actual song. i actually found the band when i was listening to other song. and then i saw someone uploaded the whole album of the band and i listened to it. i am attracted to the video because of the band's name. (Copeland is Kellin Quinn's daughter's name.)i like them. but i am not obsessed with them. but at that moment i was just trying to find a new song to listen to. so i try to listen every single one of the song from that band. and at last, i am only attached to this one song until now :)
i don't quite remember how did i find this song but what i remember was, as soon as i clicked on this song, i heard a very beautiful guitar arrangement in the beginning of the song. so then, i get the hang of it. until the end of the song. and that find that song just speaks to me at that moment. the words used in that songs just blew me away. and there was this one lyric that just makes me realise that, there's no way that there will be other song who describe it than this song can. i don't know. i just feel that the lyrics just hit in the right place. and i, even used some of the lyrics in my SPM Essay which you will find in my writings section in this blog <-- shameless self promoting.
there's a degree of difficulty in dealing with me.
this song is just plain big question mark. i am so curious about the story behind it. what the lyrics meant. it just left me thinking a lot. every lyrics just stuck in my head. i can't get away from the curiousity. every time i listen to this song, i feel like i can relate to it but i don't know which part of the lyrics. so yeah. that is freaking haunting now, does it? but somebody interpret it as the couple broke up because one of them cannot follow up with one of the partner's life as s/he is a celebrity? stars and boulevards? i don't know. all i know is just i love it.
look out, they're coming after us with big guns.
they're only gonna tell you all the bad things i've done.
even if the words they say aren't truth, they've won.
THIS SONG IS MY MOST FAVOURITE. i can't even describe how much i love this song. this song is me in a song. when people ask me to describe myself in song, i would give them this song. every lyrics of it. i found this song when i'm trying to find the song from Sala Samabojcow (Suicide Room) <-- one of my favourite song. then i found this song instead even though this song is not the soundtrack of the movie. gurllll, it's the soundtrack of me, i tell you. hahaha. and they don't even have the music video, somebody just make an edit of this song and the movie suicide room. it is so relatable. i don't know how to put it into words. really.
GOTTA SAVE THE BEST FOR THE LAST OKAYYYY THIS SONG IS MY MOST FAVOURITE SONG AS WELL. this is the first and strange is also the first. get it? both are my first most favourite. drew monson, if any of you who did not know (how dare you) is actually a youtuber. and my favourite as well. he is a friend of shane dawson. you might want to look drew's channel like i'm not even kidding. he is amazing. he is hilarious. just search mytoecold on youtube and binge watch it.
at first, i didn't even know he can sing or has a singing channel. i just found it when i saw his My Youtube Drama video. in the end of the video, he played piano and i was completely starstrucked by it. he just played it so effortlessly yet still so beautiful. so i just read the comments and found out his singing channel: thepophefakes. and i am grateful for it. his songs are beautiful. please listen to it. he is like lowkey musically talented. i am so sad that he doesn't get the attention that he deserved to get. the lyrics to this song is just completely moving. he also made a video about the song. what the lyrics meant. and you have to watch it as well. it is the most crucial part. because when i first listen to it, i don't really understand the song. but when i watched the video, i get the whole meaning of it and i am just so in love with it.
[i don't even know which lyrics are my favourite bcs they are all good af]
and that's it. that is my favourite song. funny thing is, i just realised that most of the songs that i've listed are just so underrated. when i try to find a quote or chords form the song, i couldn't find it anywhere. by the way, these are not the only song that i listened to. i listened to a lot of songs. mostly by bands. i listened to pierce the veil, panic!at the disco, of monsters and men, paramore, fall out boys, my chemical romance. and i love all of their songs. but i just feel like it's not fair for me to pick only one song from the band as my favourite because there is a lot of songs that i equally love. so... yeah. anyway, this post took me two hours to write. aha. this is why i like to put my post on schedule so i won't get carried away by writing the post. so yeah, i hope any of you who reads this, listen to it and like it? i don't know. i feel like my music taste is different from all of my friends.
waddup yall. okay i maybe need something a little less cheesy than that lol. but whatever. can you feel the love tonight? maybe it is not night time but still, can you feel the love? weirdo. but whatever. i don't care. i don't care if monday's blue. tuesday's grey and wednesday too. thursday, i don't care about you. it's FRIDAY I'M IN LOVE. (if you sang along then, bravo!)
it's time, guys. the first time ever for this year. a monthly favourite post. last year's attempt was a massive fail ahaha. there was only one post for it. however, this year i came up with another idea for my monthly favourite post. so, i thought on how can i make it sound fancier and much more exciting than just *inserts the name of the month* favourites. so there's that. i took the idea from the cure - friday i'm in love. i hope i won't get banned for any copyright issue. welp.
so i have found that i'm in love with a lot of things this month. so, bear with me because i have a feeling that this is going to be a quite long post to read as i have been doing that most of the time these days. i ramble a lot, if you haven't known that yet. but anyway, let's just go off straight to the post, shall we? (also, mind you that i didn't take a picture for the post aha so i will be taking pictures on google or weheartit sorry)
let's just start off with the thing that i love the MOST. like the most favourite out of all my favourites and it is a book. aha. how surprising is that. but i am sure that if you have read that book, you will agree with me that you won't stop bragging about it. the book is entitled All The Bright Places by Jennifer Niven. OKAY. STOP, RIGHT NOW. EVERYBODY FREEZE AND LISTEN TO WHAT I AM GOING TO SAY, OKAY? this book is just not amazing book. this book is beyond amazing. or i can say that, it is beyond perfection. so, if you haven't read this book yet, i recommend you to sit down, make a cup of tea and read the crap out of this book. i feel like this book are so underhyped and it deserve more than that. also, there was going to be a movie for this book so i encourage you to take your hands on this book and start reading now. you won't regret it. even i, myself read that book twice. yep. i reread the book as soon as i finish reading the book. i will never want to finish the book.
see, i just haven't talked about what this book really is about. i have just talked about how amazing this book is in just a paragraph, which i hope that i can ensure you how good this book is. basically, if you have read the book My Heart and Other Black Holes, it is almost the same. ALMOST. also, i feel like the guy character in the book, Theodore Finch a.k.a my boyfriend, have the same personality as Keith in the movie Keith. if you have seen that movie, you will know that Keith is the kind of guy who is different than any other else. he is very random and he did random stuffs, and so did Finch. i have never fallen in love with a fictional character as much as i do to Finch. maybe, my expectations to guys will be as high as the sky that i, myself will never be able to reach. bye, guys. i am going to marry my fictional boyfriend and live happily ever after.
so, as i said earlier, there is going to be a movie for that book and they already chose Elle Fanning to be the Violet Markey and have yet to choose Theodore Finch. and as the author describes Finch as a guy with a sky-blue eyes and black hair, i think that Nicholas Hoult would be the perfect person to be Finch. but some people think that he is too mature to be Finch. but i don't care. i want him, and him alone to be my Finch. that is it. i will make all of you guys sign a petition for that.
enough about my favourite book. i will never stop talk about it if i haven't remind myself that i still have a lot of things to talk about in this post. phew. so, the next thing i love in this month is, the movie: Miracle in Cell no. 7. okay, this one. i had to blame my friend for letting me drown in tears. my friend, Sara, who i had a sleepover with in my house was suggesting us to watch that movie. and i have heard great things about it. all i heard that it is a really sad, sad movie. and the saddest movie that i have ever watched is I Am Sam.
apparently, this movie is kinda similar to that movie but sadder and it's Korean. and when i heard that it is going to be sad, i was mentally prepared. i thought that it was going to be like sad of a tear rolling off my cheeks. INSTEAD, there was like a tsunami coming upon my eyes. i was like Alice who is swimming in her own tears but worse, i was drowning in it. never thought that i will be alive. i proper cried like somebody just died or something. it was that SAD. so, i suggest you to watch that movie but all you have to do is be mentally and emotionally prepared of what's coming towards the end.
another movie that I have been loving is Scott Pilgrim vs. The World. if you have heard about it, and never seen it, i think you should. however, i don't feel like everyone will like it. because it has a very different concept in that movie. it has like a mix of fantasy, action, musical, comedy, and all that sort of stuff. but i think you should give it a try. this movie is from a graphic novel and it is just well adapted. i think this movie is so underrated, because there's not much people are talking about it. but hey, i am not here to force you to like what i like.
another thing that i have been binge-watching for the past few weeks and still am now is Dance Moms. i have been rewatching it from season 1. despite all the mama dramas in that show, i love love love all the girls. they are incredibly talented. GOD, i wish i can have all those legs and body and dance skills. although, i despise abby with all my might. i don't let it get in my way from watching them. because, we need to remind ourselves sometimes, that reality tv shows aren't really showing us the reality. some of them are kind of made up. so, i don't care what the show portray the girls as, i still love them. i don'teven have a favourite because the girls are all great and different. they all have their own capabilities. ugh i sound so cliche somebody please slap me in the face. still, i love that show since day one.
look at that. i mean, DAMN. also, my fav group routine.
the next thing that i love is going to be cliche so please go get a bucket and get ready to throw up any time sooner. it is my blog. aha. i love that i have decided to start blogging more often. as i haven't been to school for moths now, i think that my writing gets a little bit rusty if i didn't practise it on my own. so, i took blogging as my homework. and i feel like this blog is my responsibility although i don't feel like there is actually real people who truly read my most-of-the-time-rambling posts. if you are one of them, you rock. thank you for reading. i feel the need to improve my writing when i read Hannah Maggs and Zoella's blogs. they put up the words flawlessly and it fits perfectly together. whereas for me, i just threw in words that i think will make it do.
the highlight of my month is probably the trip to Bangkok. and i could talk about it more but i have already written a post about that in the previous post, so you might as well want to check out on that. all i am hoping is just i could travel and trravel and travel until i don't have anywhere else that i can go to. maybe even the other planets, who knows? i'm a weirdo. talking about Bangkok, i just remembered that i have bought this lovely sweater that i love. it is so comfortable i could wear it everyday. and here's a picture of me wearing it so you can't really see it (but it's a rip off of a NIKE sweater but i swear it's comfy i could make a bed out of it and that is all that matters);
i know that i said that i have a lot of things that i love this month and it turned out not that much. but i think nobody will really give a damn about it hahaha. whatever it is, this has been a really long post. i doubt anybody else would read it until the end if i keep going on about other stuffs that don't quite matter. so it think, that's that. thank you for reading. love ya. x
hola. we meet again with a post about things that i love. sounds familiar? yeah. i just talk about it yesterday. time flies, huh? but heyyyy, it's friday again. you do know what it means, right? it is time for us, the ultimate fangirls and fanboys out there to let out their inner fangirling skills. yep. yep. as you are aware of the title, to day i am going to talk about Dodie Clark.
so here goes my fan edit that i did for Dodie Clark me Lahv <3
i am really trying hard to step up my editing skills aha
to those who don't know who she is, why? okay, sorry. she does singing and vlogging and all. she also does have original songs that she wrote herself which are amazing. i seriously cannot choose which ones are the best really. you really need to hear them out. but most of all, i like her because her videos give me some sort of the feeling like i am home. although i have been subscribing to her for quite a long time, i haven't been watching her youtube videos until recently. and i regret instantly for not obsessing her earlier in the time. she is just amazingly talented and that is all i could say. words cannot describe how amazing she is. i like the way she talks. i can really feel like she is talking to me soul to soul. like i am not even kidding. i feel close to her. i feel like i am home. is that weird? i am a fangirl. nothing about fangirling is weird. shush.
Favourite Quote(s):
"the things that you don't like, someone else LOVES."
can i just quotes the whole lyrics of sick of losing soulmates by her? hahahah. cause it is just amazingggg.
I FREAKING SHIP HER AND JON COZART (FULLSTOP). i mean there is a reason why an awkward duet is my favourite video. only God knows how many times did I watch that. too many. countless times.
and there goes my fangirl friday woohoo! seriously. go subscribe to her because she is just brilliant. if you are not subscribing, you really are missing out, mister. i am serious. this is serious. okay, i am done with this. somebody take me out from here.
haluuu. as what i said earlier this week, i will be having a section(?) every friday called #fangirlfriday. it is just me having an excuse to fangirl in my blog. and today is my first post ever on #fangirlfriday and i'm super thrilled. in #fangirlfriday, i will be posting a picture that i edited myself and just state some few things and favourites by them. so, yeah.
here goes my fan edit for Zoe Sugg;
i am not an expert for this fan edit thing yet soz lol
the first time i watched her video was when i was 15 (almost 3 years ago). and the first video that i watched was her draw my life video. at first i wasn't drawn to her because i'm not into beauty that much. so i just started to watch her non-beauty video. and i started to watch her hauls and favourites. and growing up as a girl, i finally trying to approach to this beauty stuffs and i got attached to her. i feel like when i watch her video, i feel like she is talking to me. like she is really trying to communicate with me. she is always positive as what she always shown in her vlogs. i know that some of you ight say that, well, she is only filming what she wanted to show to people. and i agree. but that's my point. instead of making a video to throw hatred to someone which is not very nice, she decided to make a few positive videos that can help people to get through their problems. right? and what i like the most about her. despite the fact that she has over 9 mil subscribers, she is still making videos frequently. she is always there, ready to film even though she has a lot of things to get done like her beauty range and books. i like that she is now much more comfortable in her videos.
Favourite Quote(s):
"unfortunately, there are some insecure people. there's a lot of insecure people. there's things about us that we don't like and there's things about us that we do like. and some really sad cases, there's nothing that we like about ourselves. but i think it's important to know that, that is your perception of yourselves. that is not everyone's perception of you. and you are beautiful and everyone is different and everyone is perfect in their own way."
"i think you never really know who you are, and that's not a bad thing."
Favourite Video(s):
okay, so there is a lot but i'll try not to give all of the videos.
...and i failed. it's so hard to choose okay. ugh.
Favourite Collab(s):
ZOE AND TYLER DUHHH
Zoe and Joe. the suggs are the best keyh.
Zoe and Alfie. you can never have enough Zalfie.
Zoe and Gabby. um i mean #friendshipgoals???
Who do I ship her with:
Zalfie (has to be on the top bcs it's real guys)
Zaspar (but it will never happen)
Zinn? Finnella? Zack? Jackella? (Zoe with one of the Jack and Finn twins. i can't choose.)
so there you go. my first ever #fangirlfriday post. this is fun, really. talking about something that i love love love. i seriously cannot wait for another #fangirlfriday post ahh. friday please come faster, please.
i do not even know what makes me think this is a good topic to talk about. obviously, this will be on lengthy post. GOOD LUCK TO YOU WHO HAS SIGNED UP TO BE WITH ME IN THIS JOURNEY.
what even.
okay, i think i am going to make it less crucial. i do not even know if that is a suitable word that i am looking for right now. clearly, i shouldn't be blogging while i'm half awake. but hey, this is what we call determination.
apparently, i have a lot of obsessions. but i'm just going to make this post about youtube obsession.
why am i using so much space. GOD.
okay so, lately i have discovered something new about me. not really new. but it is growing like a sprout. idk idk. sprout? really? okay, let's just continue with this crap. i am to lazy to press the backspace button. so, half of the post is probably going to be me, talking to myself. huh. bear with me, thanks. as i was saying, i have found myself less interested in watching movies. instead, i prefer to binge watch youtube videos for days. for months. years. centuries. you name it. i do not know if this is something for me to be worried about. i may just need something to talk. or write.
each day, everyday, i will always find an excuse for me to watch youtube video. i can guarantee you that by the time SPM result has come out, i probably have watched all of the videos that has been uploaded on that site.
hey, i have watched a 2-hour video of jackspeticeye's life is strange, okay! don't judge me.i wanted to give a list of my favourite youtubers at the moment but i don't think it's a good idea. it changes most of the time but i never gave up the old one. the obsession just grows bigger and bigger. like an infection. what a great metaphor, liyana. i deserve a round of applause, guys. please lah.
i seriously don't know why am i making this post. i just feel the need to write something cause i want to get something out of my mind. whatever the something is, it surely bothers me.
sorry for ranting.
bye.
bye again.
don't miss me.
thanks for reading.
sorry for wasting your time.
i promise i will write something good later.
probably.
kbye.
do excuse that, this post was originally entitled obsession. but i changed it to youtube obsession. and considering the fact that i was ranting most of the time, i change the title to what is it now. so, there goes the history of the tile of this post.
to be honest, it is hard for me to fathom the fact that i have ended high school. whoa. time does fly, aye. thinking about the world outside school really gives me an eerie feeling. to think about it, i can barely handle the pressure in high school so how the *beep* am i going to handle the real world? but that is it. we have to face it, so then we can finally overcome our fear. am i right, or am i right? hahaha.
my spm ended on the 7th of December, which is a week later than the other students in my school. sucks, tell me about it. we had to learn that one particular subject throughout the whole week. we had no choice anyway. so i guess the last test went quite well? i don't even know because most of the time, my mind was filled with the thoughts of what am i going to do after the test, which is a lot of things. aaaaand i ended up doing nothing, just binge watching some youtube videos. what a life. i also have some books to read (when i said some, there are actually 8 books eagerly waiting to be read) yep. yep. i'm all about that books.
right after the test ended, my class teacher, along with my classmates and I went to have a somewhat picnic(?) i don't even know. what i do know is we had a lot of fun and food. food matters. being the 'normal' youth as we all are, we took tons of picture. so i'm just going to insert some of the pictures, if you excuse me.
i'm not going to upload all of the pictures though but yeah. most of us were squinting because it was too bright and sunny. protect your eyes (and skin), lads.
so now, i don't know what should i do. well, i want to find a job but i don't know where to start. well, being introvert and socially awkward simultaneously are not the best combination, i suppose. i'm just that bad in talking with people. like seriously. i stutter a lot. i have literally 1% self-confidence, or 2.5% if i'm lucky. other than that, meh. i really wish i can be a blogger as my profession. or fangirl. because that's what i do best, not interacting with people in real life.
i think that is it. i don't have anything to say. so long and good night *sings Helena by MCR* hahah good byeeeeeeeeee xx
before i could scream to myself, i know. i haven't been posting for quite awhile. but that is because i am just lazy. no reason needed. haish. futhermore, i have a lot to tell just too hard to put it into words. i am still stuck with my short stories and all. i think i have to start over a new one. i am feeling a little bit fantasy inspired haha idk. but anyway, i went to Big Bad Wolf Book Sale last Tuesday i guess with my favourite little one {Amira Farain} hehe. first of all, it was a fun day. it was a real unexpected fun day. you know the day when you just plan what you are going to do but it turned out pretty awesome? yeah. THAT kind of day. big bad wolf was awesome. i wish i could go there again but i am quite broke at the moment so HAH till then, see you next year mr wolfy *wipes tears dramatically* hahaha but seriously. it was amazing. i bought FOUR books for RM30 only! How crazy is that? normally, i could get only one book for RM30. Big Bad Wolf saved my life as i haven't been buying new books lately. but yay!
we fangirled like crazy people might think we escaped from the asylum or something...
all because of books.
yep.
after that, we went to JBCC because we planned to eat dinner outside. so we walked around together. and then, we bumped into these guys...
a day full of ma faves awh hahahaha oh yeah Amira and I were wearing the same sweater hehehe #twinning4lyf. okay back to the topic hahaha, well we knew that the guys were there and i was kinda hoping that we would meet or what. then, as we were window shopping, suddenly they came up to us. i guess you can say i was surprise i nearly had a heart attack. how very dramatic of me. but really though.
after that, we talked for awhile and took selfie {obviously!} for a bit and thennnnnnn i met my cousin. see what i mean? favourite people. Amira and I then went to Bath & Body Works. like always, we fangirled a lot. we smelt almost everything in the shop before my cousin came in and told me to pick anything cheap hahaha so i picked the Mad About You fragrance mist. hahaha. she paid for it though. thanks kak nadiiii <3
we went to dinner before we went home hehe it was seriously such a fun day. thanks to ma favourite people! i looooooooove you guys so much <3 i smiled the whole through writing this blog post. even thinking about it makes me happy. idk sometimes the simplest thing in life can actually make you happy. so do whatever you want, you might create great memories with it, right? so, why not? ;)
at first, i wanted to make a challenge then i decided not to because i am not very dedicated lol. i didn't plan to make this blog post about this tv shows called Dance Moms, but then, i feel like i wanted to. i have seen this shows since season 1 but stopped at season 3 last year(?) because malaysia's lifetime has stopped showing them idk why. so i started to watch the season 4 back this past two days online. i finished it ni two days. yep. but i still don't have the chance to catch up on the new season. i have cried and laughed and be mad for this two days (which makes me realise that i have became more sensitive than before). so this show is about a group of girls who dance at ALDC (Abby Lee Dance Company) since they were toddlers. they went to a new competition every week and have to perform the dance routine that they learnt for within a week with some bunch of mamas dramas. and these are the original six;
from the left; Brooke Hyland, Mackenzie Ziegler, Maddie Ziegler, Chloe Lukasiak, Paige Hyland, and Nia Frazier.
so basically they are dancers with their own talents and capabilities. i really love all of them, it's hard to choose which one is my favourite. they are all amazing (seriously, i would kill to have any dancing skills, especially ballet). their dance routine has been taught by their dance teacher who is the owner of ALDC, Abby Miller. she did an amazing job with the routines. BUT she is a really tough cookie. Maddie Ziegler, has been her all time favourite. Abby keeps comparing Maddie with the other kids which is really bad because the last thing a child wants is to be compared to another kid. they have their own talents, capabilities, what they can do and what they can't do. i know she just wanted the best for them but comparing people to let the others down and telling them that what they do is not good enough isn't a great teaching method. she is mentally abusing them.
and there comes the second season. another girl had been brought into the team by an audition, Kendall Vertes.
every other season, kids come and go. but the most thing to highlight is during season 4. Abby brought another team with girls that she has chosen during the audition into ALDC. the girls have to compete with each other to prove which team deserves the place in ALDC. the ending is very heart breaking. enough with the Hylands quit ALDC, then Chloe and her mom, Christi, ended up leaving ALDC. even though Chloe won the highest score for ALDC (although she was in the fifth place, she is yet the highest between the three soloists), and even in the winning team, Abby wasn't really satisfied when Chloe beat Kamryn (a girl that she brought in the new team). Chloe even beat Kamryn twice, yet Abby still felt like Chloe didn't deserve to win. WHICH IS HEARTBREAKING BECAUSE CHLOE OVERHEARD WHAT ABBY SAID ABOUT HER TO CHLOE'S MOM.
i'm still really sad. because some of these kids are too young to handle this, they are so strong. for example Mackenzie who has always been compared to her sister Maddie a lot. i mean, she is Mackenzie and she will always be Mackenzie. she doesn't have to be Maddie to be great. seeing this kids getting hurt at such a young age is really hard. tbh, these girls are amazing in their own way. everything just seems to have fallen apart. the number of the member has been decreasing.
those are the ones that are left in the team. but i heard that Kalani (which is also a graceful dancer as they all are) will be in the team in season 5.
it hurts to see the friendships between them have grown apart. but this is just what the media has shown to us and what the media wants us to see. i hope they still do what they do. and be the best version of themselves.
this is just my opinion, but i don't think it matters because i'm not a dancer. i don't mean to offend anyone. okay. i feel like a creepy 17-year-old-girl who stalks them. hahaha i don't care. the fangirl life chooses me, i don't choose the fangirl life. or maybe i do...
in case you were wondering, yes, that Maddie is Maddie Ziegler who is featured as the dancer that potrays Sia when she was younger, in two of her music videos, Chandelier and Elastic Heart, which is really amazing. (please check it out!)
hello, dear people. to whom it may concern, today i'm going to talk about my favourite books of 2014. the one that i read in 2014, not the one that was published in 2014. i have chosen 10 books instead of 14 because.... it's so damn hard, really. i am blasting to my favourite ever song {strange - tokio hotel ft. kerli} while updating this blog. but they don't have strange in spotify which annoys me because i can't autoplay it. i have been listening to this song on repeat for the past few days. like seriously. also, i celebrated new year with watching suicide room {also my favourite movie}. because i have a life, duh? but today, i'm not going to talk about my favourite movie nor song. instead,i'm going to talk about my favourite books as i mentioned it earlier. but i won't be talking deeper about the plot kayyy. here's a little sneak peek of my favourite books of 2014.
so let's start with the 10th place.
10. Tape by Steven Camden.
okay. first and foremost, this book is very light-hearted. i love how the two characters are connected though it is not in the same generation. i love the 'romance' in this story because it's not very heavy. i don't really like romance book that much idk why. {which in this case, i love looking for alaska more than the fault in our stars} and i cried reading this book but not when i read the fault in our stars. yes. my emotion is weird.
9. Girl Online by Zoe Sugg.
i said that i'm going to do a review of this book but then i changed my mind. i think this is sorta overhyped book. but still it's good. it's not as good as i expected it to be. also, i've heard that this book is ghost-written which i don't know if it's true or not because when i read it, i feel connected to Zoe. the book is so her. i still love Zoe no matter what though. but i do like the concept of it. a blogging concept. she also did a great job putting anxiety into words. i like the characters, especially Elliot. he is really an amazing friend anybody could ask for! i wish i have him in real life though. he helped Penny so much, especially on the flight. but i really like this book. SO MUCH.
8. This Star Won't Go Out by Esther Grace Earl.
this is a non-fiction, a biography by a cancer patient. a story by a very strong girl indeed. unfortunately, she passed away. it's a story about her life being a cancer patient. reading it, i can feel the struggles and the pain. she was also an amazingly beautiful writer. it's a very heartfelt story. Esther Earl: this star won't go out.
7. Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell.
this. book. is. life. i am a fangirl so i can relate to the character so much. SO MUCH. i feel like i am Cath without the twin part. from the introvert version of herself to the ultimate fangirl. hahaha. also, levi is so freaking cute. i imagined Andrew Garfield as Levi ahhh <3 i can connect to the character so well.
6. The Beginning of Everything by Robyn Schneider.
i saw the book in Ingrid's favourite video. she featured the book in it. after that, i knew that i need to buy this book and read it. i instantly fell in love with this book. SO MUCH. it's beautifully written. the writing, the storylines, the ending. though the ending is kind of heartbreaking. my favourite part is the firework part. i almost cried when Ezra's dog was eaten by the coyote though.
5. The Girl Who Could Fly by Victoria Forester.
OKAY. THIS IS A MIDDLE GRADE BOOK BT WHATEVER. still this is the best middle grade book i have ever read. it's kinda like younger version of Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children, but i like this better. maybe because i read this before Miss Peregrine's. i find it way too deep for a middle grade. but for every words that i read, i fell in love with it, deeper and deeper.
4. 13 Reasons Why by Jay Asher.
this book hit me like a truck. this is my kind of book. i write stuff like this. i can give you 13 reasons {..or even more} reasons why to love this book. seriously though. it captured me in every way. if you read this book, don't forget to listen to the tape in Youtube. especially the last tape. i wasn't expecting that really.
3. Popular by Maya Van Wagenen.
okay. this is another non-fiction that i read this year. I LOVE IT. and this book is written by a 15-year-old girl. i cant even.... that's amazing. she's so lucky to have such an opportunity. she, too, is an amazing human being. i am amazed how can a 15-year-old girl do such thing. basically, it's about a girl who was a social outcast but then she found this book, which was written for about sixty years or so? i don't remember. anyways, the book is about how to be a popular. and she actually did {surprisingly} become popular by following what the book said. rules meant to be break sometimes. status quo doesn't mean anything anyways. believe in what you believe.
okay. here comes the first runner-up. *drum rolls* 2. Burn for Burn trilogy by Jenny Han & Siobhan Vivian. SURPRISE HAHAHA the trilogy is probably going to be the first if i didn't read Harry Potter last year {spoiler alert!}. it's well written. beautifully, indeed! the cliffhangers really killed me. i died too many times throughout finishing the trilogy. i even cried from the beginning to the end. almost entirely. i'm so in love with Reeve. i could've repeat the book if i hadn't had another book to read. seriously, amazing. round off applause to both of the incredible authors. you guys did such an amazing job. okay here comes the first place... 1. HARRY POTTER SERIES BY J. K ROWLING. what a surprise, really! whew. yes. to whom it may concern. i read the series for the first time last year. i seriously had abandoned the existence of it. and of course, constantly regretted it. {blame my mom. she said that Harry Potter is not a good movie}. but of course, the whole credit goes to J. K Rowling. i don't really have to tell much about the stories though. it's just MAGICAL. *raises wand* i have 4 pottermore accounts. and that is because i want to know if i actually belongs to the house i am in. the first one is hufflepuff. and after that, i got ravenclaw and slytherin. and the last one is, hufflepuff. so i guess i really am a hufflepuff. No Ragrets. hufflepuff's common room is near the kitchen okay. there is just no way that i'm going to be in gryffindor. but yeah. i couldn't describe into words how much i love, adore [inserts every words with the same meaning as admiration] this series. although i'm late. but you can never be too late, right? better late than never. yup yup. honestly, i would freak out about Harry Potter right now but i'm trying so hard to control myself. fangirl problems. potterhead problems, mostly. hahaha. so that's it. my top 10 favourite book. i hadn't read so many books last year. but still the most throughout 16 years of my life. i don't think i will ever read more this year. i have to focus on my studies first. but that doesn't mean i can't buy it though, am i right? ;) to whoever that reads, don't you ever stop. if any of you wondering {which in my case, there's probably not} what Carpe Librum means, it means seize the book. so go on, seize the book <3
written on Thursday, February 18, 2016 @ 4:00 PM ✈
hey guyssss! here i am laying down on my bed in front my laptop, typing away some words into a full on sentence which i hope does make sense since it is like 10 minutes past 12 in the midnight. yeah, i put my blog post on schedule because i am THAT dedicated. i don't know why but i have the feeling that i have the need to talk about my favourite songs.
okay here's a thing. somehow, i find that one of the hardest question or one of a question with an infinite answer is "what is your favourite song?" and most of the time, i will just tell them about my current favourite song. it is impossible for me to answer an instant i have been questioned that question. i think i might have to sit down for a few days and write down all the songs that i love. then, i will be coming up to you with what-it-seems-like-a-harry-potter-and-the-order-of-the-phoenix but it is not. it is just as thick as that and when you read it, you will find that it is actually a list of my favourite songs.
however, in this post i won't be only talking about the songs that i love. but these are the songs that actually speaks for me. and you will find that most of the songs are actually instrumental and it is accurate. because sometimes, not even words can describe what do you feel inside, right? the songs that i will be giving out mostly have the lyrics that i found that even myself, can barely decipher thoroughly into it. instead, it will just end up with me thinking about that sing even more, trying to find and understand the lyrics, or what the story behind it. long story short, these are the songs that the lyrics or just the musics haunt me for ever.
and now that i have the song listed on my brain, i just realised that almost all of the songs are the only song that i heard and loved by a singer/band that i am not that obsessed with. (does this make sense?) and being the band obsessed as i am, i find that it is hard for me to choose only ONE SONG that i love from that band. that is just impossible. so none of the song that will be listed are from the bands or singer that i am obsessed with.
this song is just pure perfection. i find that this song gives me a roller coaster emotion. it starts of slow and in the middle it just blew me away. this is the song that gets me to dance although i am not a dancer; even terrible at it. it just hits me in the right place. oohhh, and fun fact, this song is in the movie Insidious. i was actually trying to find the song that Renee was singing with the piano and found this one instead. it is in the scene where they have moved into a new house and found somebody changing the song to Tiptoe Through The Tulips and dancing to it. it was the song before that.
well, this one, also was a main theme from a movie Requiem for a Dream. the story behind this happened recently actually. i was looking at the synthesia thing on youtube, because i was obsessed with piano instrumental at the moment. and then, i saw in the recommended section but it was entitled Requiem of a Dream and i was attracted by the title. and when the song started, i knew by that moment, i was screwed. just like Nuvole Bianche, the song starts of slow and in the middle of it, it just caused a riot in my heart. and there was this one time when i was listening to the full original version of it, not the piano instrumental version, when i was in the mall with my family. and in the piano instrumental, it wasn't a full version. so when i started to listen to the full original version of it, in the mall, i got chills and i was just starstrucked by it. and i just had to watch the movie which i find it quite interesting. not my favourite but it is a nice movie. i ended up in tears which i always do, so no surprise.
okay, this one actually i don't know what's the title because i found it on dance moms. it just happened to be the song from my most favourite group routine.; runaway/children with guns. when i rewatch the sow, i was mad because in the show they didn't really use the title children with guns and they didn't include the newscast. and i am super annoyed because the dance routine is just amazing and the story behind it just ahhhh. YOU MUST WATCH IT. i just love it so much i don't know why. but i am going to leave a video here.
okay, i just gotta save the best instrumental for the last. i discovered this song from the game Life is Strange that i watched Jacksepticeye playing. it is just amazing. i love the game, i love the soundtrack especially this one. because they used this song when Max listened to the voice mail that Nathan sent to her. and it just breaks me inside. it still does. that is like the part that all part of me shattered into pieces. HEARTBREAKING AF.
and here goes the song that is not instrumental lol
this song was also from dance moms. when i listened to this song while watching the dance routine. all i'm thing about is WHAT IS THIS ALL ABOUT???? i nearly cry every time i watch the dance routine. the lyrics is just simple but there is a whole lot meaning to it and i cannot interpret it which is disappointing for me. but all in all, i feel like the singer, is so underrated. and i have heard most of the song by them and it is actually good??? but i don't think anybody will know who they are which is very sad because they have like very good musics. thank God for dance moms. oh and also, the song was also from my favourite dance routine. so i'm gonna leave the video here for you to watch.
here is another song that i am grateful that i have mobile data and downloaded shazam because i heard this song was playing in the mall, so i just had to Shazam it. and i looked like an idiot because the volume was very low so it is hard to Shazam, then i had to raise my phone up in the air so it could detect the song. luckily, it did its job. i would be miserable if i can't find it. but to be exact, i only heard the music, not the lyrics. but when i search for the lyrics, i was like DAMN GIRL WHAT IS THISSSS. the lyrics to it just opened up my eyes and heart and mind.
i found this song from the awesomenesstv series with amanda steele on it called guidance. and in the second episode of it, if i am not mistaken, the counsellor interviewed a guy, i don't know what their relationship were. but this song started to play when they guy saw the girl dancing. when i listened to the lyrics thoroughly, i just... felt connected to it. it is so damn accurate??? but the lyrics are pretty self-explanatory. but the meaning just got me like... that explains me in a love life at that moment? aha. don't judge me.
the story about how i discover this song is pretty darn cute actually. i follow this poetry account (@wasitw0rtit) on instagram. and one day, the owner decided to make like a playlist based on each letter of our name. all we had to do was leave our name and our favourite genre. and she dm-ed me a picture of my name and the songs, which i didn't thought she would do because DAMN there was a lot of people who commented on that picture. so yeah, and one of which was this song that got me attached to it. the lyrics are very poetic, and i don't know. it is just beautiful. this song is just beautiful. i feel calm whenever listen to this song.
i didn't actually just found this actual song. i actually found the band when i was listening to other song. and then i saw someone uploaded the whole album of the band and i listened to it. i am attracted to the video because of the band's name. (Copeland is Kellin Quinn's daughter's name.)i like them. but i am not obsessed with them. but at that moment i was just trying to find a new song to listen to. so i try to listen every single one of the song from that band. and at last, i am only attached to this one song until now :)
i don't quite remember how did i find this song but what i remember was, as soon as i clicked on this song, i heard a very beautiful guitar arrangement in the beginning of the song. so then, i get the hang of it. until the end of the song. and that find that song just speaks to me at that moment. the words used in that songs just blew me away. and there was this one lyric that just makes me realise that, there's no way that there will be other song who describe it than this song can. i don't know. i just feel that the lyrics just hit in the right place. and i, even used some of the lyrics in my SPM Essay which you will find in my writings section in this blog <-- shameless self promoting.
there's a degree of difficulty in dealing with me.
this song is just plain big question mark. i am so curious about the story behind it. what the lyrics meant. it just left me thinking a lot. every lyrics just stuck in my head. i can't get away from the curiousity. every time i listen to this song, i feel like i can relate to it but i don't know which part of the lyrics. so yeah. that is freaking haunting now, does it? but somebody interpret it as the couple broke up because one of them cannot follow up with one of the partner's life as s/he is a celebrity? stars and boulevards? i don't know. all i know is just i love it.
look out, they're coming after us with big guns.
they're only gonna tell you all the bad things i've done.
even if the words they say aren't truth, they've won.
THIS SONG IS MY MOST FAVOURITE. i can't even describe how much i love this song. this song is me in a song. when people ask me to describe myself in song, i would give them this song. every lyrics of it. i found this song when i'm trying to find the song from Sala Samabojcow (Suicide Room) <-- one of my favourite song. then i found this song instead even though this song is not the soundtrack of the movie. gurllll, it's the soundtrack of me, i tell you. hahaha. and they don't even have the music video, somebody just make an edit of this song and the movie suicide room. it is so relatable. i don't know how to put it into words. really.
GOTTA SAVE THE BEST FOR THE LAST OKAYYYY THIS SONG IS MY MOST FAVOURITE SONG AS WELL. this is the first and strange is also the first. get it? both are my first most favourite. drew monson, if any of you who did not know (how dare you) is actually a youtuber. and my favourite as well. he is a friend of shane dawson. you might want to look drew's channel like i'm not even kidding. he is amazing. he is hilarious. just search mytoecold on youtube and binge watch it.
at first, i didn't even know he can sing or has a singing channel. i just found it when i saw his My Youtube Drama video. in the end of the video, he played piano and i was completely starstrucked by it. he just played it so effortlessly yet still so beautiful. so i just read the comments and found out his singing channel: thepophefakes. and i am grateful for it. his songs are beautiful. please listen to it. he is like lowkey musically talented. i am so sad that he doesn't get the attention that he deserved to get. the lyrics to this song is just completely moving. he also made a video about the song. what the lyrics meant. and you have to watch it as well. it is the most crucial part. because when i first listen to it, i don't really understand the song. but when i watched the video, i get the whole meaning of it and i am just so in love with it.
[i don't even know which lyrics are my favourite bcs they are all good af]
and that's it. that is my favourite song. funny thing is, i just realised that most of the songs that i've listed are just so underrated. when i try to find a quote or chords form the song, i couldn't find it anywhere. by the way, these are not the only song that i listened to. i listened to a lot of songs. mostly by bands. i listened to pierce the veil, panic!at the disco, of monsters and men, paramore, fall out boys, my chemical romance. and i love all of their songs. but i just feel like it's not fair for me to pick only one song from the band as my favourite because there is a lot of songs that i equally love. so... yeah. anyway, this post took me two hours to write. aha. this is why i like to put my post on schedule so i won't get carried away by writing the post. so yeah, i hope any of you who reads this, listen to it and like it? i don't know. i feel like my music taste is different from all of my friends.
waddup yall. okay i maybe need something a little less cheesy than that lol. but whatever. can you feel the love tonight? maybe it is not night time but still, can you feel the love? weirdo. but whatever. i don't care. i don't care if monday's blue. tuesday's grey and wednesday too. thursday, i don't care about you. it's FRIDAY I'M IN LOVE. (if you sang along then, bravo!)
it's time, guys. the first time ever for this year. a monthly favourite post. last year's attempt was a massive fail ahaha. there was only one post for it. however, this year i came up with another idea for my monthly favourite post. so, i thought on how can i make it sound fancier and much more exciting than just *inserts the name of the month* favourites. so there's that. i took the idea from the cure - friday i'm in love. i hope i won't get banned for any copyright issue. welp.
so i have found that i'm in love with a lot of things this month. so, bear with me because i have a feeling that this is going to be a quite long post to read as i have been doing that most of the time these days. i ramble a lot, if you haven't known that yet. but anyway, let's just go off straight to the post, shall we? (also, mind you that i didn't take a picture for the post aha so i will be taking pictures on google or weheartit sorry)
let's just start off with the thing that i love the MOST. like the most favourite out of all my favourites and it is a book. aha. how surprising is that. but i am sure that if you have read that book, you will agree with me that you won't stop bragging about it. the book is entitled All The Bright Places by Jennifer Niven. OKAY. STOP, RIGHT NOW. EVERYBODY FREEZE AND LISTEN TO WHAT I AM GOING TO SAY, OKAY? this book is just not amazing book. this book is beyond amazing. or i can say that, it is beyond perfection. so, if you haven't read this book yet, i recommend you to sit down, make a cup of tea and read the crap out of this book. i feel like this book are so underhyped and it deserve more than that. also, there was going to be a movie for this book so i encourage you to take your hands on this book and start reading now. you won't regret it. even i, myself read that book twice. yep. i reread the book as soon as i finish reading the book. i will never want to finish the book.
see, i just haven't talked about what this book really is about. i have just talked about how amazing this book is in just a paragraph, which i hope that i can ensure you how good this book is. basically, if you have read the book My Heart and Other Black Holes, it is almost the same. ALMOST. also, i feel like the guy character in the book, Theodore Finch a.k.a my boyfriend, have the same personality as Keith in the movie Keith. if you have seen that movie, you will know that Keith is the kind of guy who is different than any other else. he is very random and he did random stuffs, and so did Finch. i have never fallen in love with a fictional character as much as i do to Finch. maybe, my expectations to guys will be as high as the sky that i, myself will never be able to reach. bye, guys. i am going to marry my fictional boyfriend and live happily ever after.
so, as i said earlier, there is going to be a movie for that book and they already chose Elle Fanning to be the Violet Markey and have yet to choose Theodore Finch. and as the author describes Finch as a guy with a sky-blue eyes and black hair, i think that Nicholas Hoult would be the perfect person to be Finch. but some people think that he is too mature to be Finch. but i don't care. i want him, and him alone to be my Finch. that is it. i will make all of you guys sign a petition for that.
enough about my favourite book. i will never stop talk about it if i haven't remind myself that i still have a lot of things to talk about in this post. phew. so, the next thing i love in this month is, the movie: Miracle in Cell no. 7. okay, this one. i had to blame my friend for letting me drown in tears. my friend, Sara, who i had a sleepover with in my house was suggesting us to watch that movie. and i have heard great things about it. all i heard that it is a really sad, sad movie. and the saddest movie that i have ever watched is I Am Sam.
apparently, this movie is kinda similar to that movie but sadder and it's Korean. and when i heard that it is going to be sad, i was mentally prepared. i thought that it was going to be like sad of a tear rolling off my cheeks. INSTEAD, there was like a tsunami coming upon my eyes. i was like Alice who is swimming in her own tears but worse, i was drowning in it. never thought that i will be alive. i proper cried like somebody just died or something. it was that SAD. so, i suggest you to watch that movie but all you have to do is be mentally and emotionally prepared of what's coming towards the end.
another movie that I have been loving is Scott Pilgrim vs. The World. if you have heard about it, and never seen it, i think you should. however, i don't feel like everyone will like it. because it has a very different concept in that movie. it has like a mix of fantasy, action, musical, comedy, and all that sort of stuff. but i think you should give it a try. this movie is from a graphic novel and it is just well adapted. i think this movie is so underrated, because there's not much people are talking about it. but hey, i am not here to force you to like what i like.
another thing that i have been binge-watching for the past few weeks and still am now is Dance Moms. i have been rewatching it from season 1. despite all the mama dramas in that show, i love love love all the girls. they are incredibly talented. GOD, i wish i can have all those legs and body and dance skills. although, i despise abby with all my might. i don't let it get in my way from watching them. because, we need to remind ourselves sometimes, that reality tv shows aren't really showing us the reality. some of them are kind of made up. so, i don't care what the show portray the girls as, i still love them. i don'teven have a favourite because the girls are all great and different. they all have their own capabilities. ugh i sound so cliche somebody please slap me in the face. still, i love that show since day one.
look at that. i mean, DAMN. also, my fav group routine.
the next thing that i love is going to be cliche so please go get a bucket and get ready to throw up any time sooner. it is my blog. aha. i love that i have decided to start blogging more often. as i haven't been to school for moths now, i think that my writing gets a little bit rusty if i didn't practise it on my own. so, i took blogging as my homework. and i feel like this blog is my responsibility although i don't feel like there is actually real people who truly read my most-of-the-time-rambling posts. if you are one of them, you rock. thank you for reading. i feel the need to improve my writing when i read Hannah Maggs and Zoella's blogs. they put up the words flawlessly and it fits perfectly together. whereas for me, i just threw in words that i think will make it do.
the highlight of my month is probably the trip to Bangkok. and i could talk about it more but i have already written a post about that in the previous post, so you might as well want to check out on that. all i am hoping is just i could travel and trravel and travel until i don't have anywhere else that i can go to. maybe even the other planets, who knows? i'm a weirdo. talking about Bangkok, i just remembered that i have bought this lovely sweater that i love. it is so comfortable i could wear it everyday. and here's a picture of me wearing it so you can't really see it (but it's a rip off of a NIKE sweater but i swear it's comfy i could make a bed out of it and that is all that matters);
i know that i said that i have a lot of things that i love this month and it turned out not that much. but i think nobody will really give a damn about it hahaha. whatever it is, this has been a really long post. i doubt anybody else would read it until the end if i keep going on about other stuffs that don't quite matter. so it think, that's that. thank you for reading. love ya. x
hola. we meet again with a post about things that i love. sounds familiar? yeah. i just talk about it yesterday. time flies, huh? but heyyyy, it's friday again. you do know what it means, right? it is time for us, the ultimate fangirls and fanboys out there to let out their inner fangirling skills. yep. yep. as you are aware of the title, to day i am going to talk about Dodie Clark.
so here goes my fan edit that i did for Dodie Clark me Lahv <3
i am really trying hard to step up my editing skills aha
to those who don't know who she is, why? okay, sorry. she does singing and vlogging and all. she also does have original songs that she wrote herself which are amazing. i seriously cannot choose which ones are the best really. you really need to hear them out. but most of all, i like her because her videos give me some sort of the feeling like i am home. although i have been subscribing to her for quite a long time, i haven't been watching her youtube videos until recently. and i regret instantly for not obsessing her earlier in the time. she is just amazingly talented and that is all i could say. words cannot describe how amazing she is. i like the way she talks. i can really feel like she is talking to me soul to soul. like i am not even kidding. i feel close to her. i feel like i am home. is that weird? i am a fangirl. nothing about fangirling is weird. shush.
Favourite Quote(s):
"the things that you don't like, someone else LOVES."
can i just quotes the whole lyrics of sick of losing soulmates by her? hahahah. cause it is just amazingggg.
I FREAKING SHIP HER AND JON COZART (FULLSTOP). i mean there is a reason why an awkward duet is my favourite video. only God knows how many times did I watch that. too many. countless times.
and there goes my fangirl friday woohoo! seriously. go subscribe to her because she is just brilliant. if you are not subscribing, you really are missing out, mister. i am serious. this is serious. okay, i am done with this. somebody take me out from here.
haluuu. as what i said earlier this week, i will be having a section(?) every friday called #fangirlfriday. it is just me having an excuse to fangirl in my blog. and today is my first post ever on #fangirlfriday and i'm super thrilled. in #fangirlfriday, i will be posting a picture that i edited myself and just state some few things and favourites by them. so, yeah.
here goes my fan edit for Zoe Sugg;
i am not an expert for this fan edit thing yet soz lol
the first time i watched her video was when i was 15 (almost 3 years ago). and the first video that i watched was her draw my life video. at first i wasn't drawn to her because i'm not into beauty that much. so i just started to watch her non-beauty video. and i started to watch her hauls and favourites. and growing up as a girl, i finally trying to approach to this beauty stuffs and i got attached to her. i feel like when i watch her video, i feel like she is talking to me. like she is really trying to communicate with me. she is always positive as what she always shown in her vlogs. i know that some of you ight say that, well, she is only filming what she wanted to show to people. and i agree. but that's my point. instead of making a video to throw hatred to someone which is not very nice, she decided to make a few positive videos that can help people to get through their problems. right? and what i like the most about her. despite the fact that she has over 9 mil subscribers, she is still making videos frequently. she is always there, ready to film even though she has a lot of things to get done like her beauty range and books. i like that she is now much more comfortable in her videos.
Favourite Quote(s):
"unfortunately, there are some insecure people. there's a lot of insecure people. there's things about us that we don't like and there's things about us that we do like. and some really sad cases, there's nothing that we like about ourselves. but i think it's important to know that, that is your perception of yourselves. that is not everyone's perception of you. and you are beautiful and everyone is different and everyone is perfect in their own way."
"i think you never really know who you are, and that's not a bad thing."
Favourite Video(s):
okay, so there is a lot but i'll try not to give all of the videos.
...and i failed. it's so hard to choose okay. ugh.
Favourite Collab(s):
ZOE AND TYLER DUHHH
Zoe and Joe. the suggs are the best keyh.
Zoe and Alfie. you can never have enough Zalfie.
Zoe and Gabby. um i mean #friendshipgoals???
Who do I ship her with:
Zalfie (has to be on the top bcs it's real guys)
Zaspar (but it will never happen)
Zinn? Finnella? Zack? Jackella? (Zoe with one of the Jack and Finn twins. i can't choose.)
so there you go. my first ever #fangirlfriday post. this is fun, really. talking about something that i love love love. i seriously cannot wait for another #fangirlfriday post ahh. friday please come faster, please.
written on Thursday, December 10, 2015 @ 12:36 AM ✈
okay, guys.
it is finally time.
for me.
TO RANT ABOUT MY OBSESSION.
i do not even know what makes me think this is a good topic to talk about. obviously, this will be on lengthy post. GOOD LUCK TO YOU WHO HAS SIGNED UP TO BE WITH ME IN THIS JOURNEY.
what even.
okay, i think i am going to make it less crucial. i do not even know if that is a suitable word that i am looking for right now. clearly, i shouldn't be blogging while i'm half awake. but hey, this is what we call determination.
apparently, i have a lot of obsessions. but i'm just going to make this post about youtube obsession.
why am i using so much space. GOD.
okay so, lately i have discovered something new about me. not really new. but it is growing like a sprout. idk idk. sprout? really? okay, let's just continue with this crap. i am to lazy to press the backspace button. so, half of the post is probably going to be me, talking to myself. huh. bear with me, thanks. as i was saying, i have found myself less interested in watching movies. instead, i prefer to binge watch youtube videos for days. for months. years. centuries. you name it. i do not know if this is something for me to be worried about. i may just need something to talk. or write.
each day, everyday, i will always find an excuse for me to watch youtube video. i can guarantee you that by the time SPM result has come out, i probably have watched all of the videos that has been uploaded on that site.
hey, i have watched a 2-hour video of jackspeticeye's life is strange, okay! don't judge me.i wanted to give a list of my favourite youtubers at the moment but i don't think it's a good idea. it changes most of the time but i never gave up the old one. the obsession just grows bigger and bigger. like an infection. what a great metaphor, liyana. i deserve a round of applause, guys. please lah.
i seriously don't know why am i making this post. i just feel the need to write something cause i want to get something out of my mind. whatever the something is, it surely bothers me.
sorry for ranting.
bye.
bye again.
don't miss me.
thanks for reading.
sorry for wasting your time.
i promise i will write something good later.
probably.
kbye.
do excuse that, this post was originally entitled obsession. but i changed it to youtube obsession. and considering the fact that i was ranting most of the time, i change the title to what is it now. so, there goes the history of the tile of this post.
to be honest, it is hard for me to fathom the fact that i have ended high school. whoa. time does fly, aye. thinking about the world outside school really gives me an eerie feeling. to think about it, i can barely handle the pressure in high school so how the *beep* am i going to handle the real world? but that is it. we have to face it, so then we can finally overcome our fear. am i right, or am i right? hahaha.
my spm ended on the 7th of December, which is a week later than the other students in my school. sucks, tell me about it. we had to learn that one particular subject throughout the whole week. we had no choice anyway. so i guess the last test went quite well? i don't even know because most of the time, my mind was filled with the thoughts of what am i going to do after the test, which is a lot of things. aaaaand i ended up doing nothing, just binge watching some youtube videos. what a life. i also have some books to read (when i said some, there are actually 8 books eagerly waiting to be read) yep. yep. i'm all about that books.
right after the test ended, my class teacher, along with my classmates and I went to have a somewhat picnic(?) i don't even know. what i do know is we had a lot of fun and food. food matters. being the 'normal' youth as we all are, we took tons of picture. so i'm just going to insert some of the pictures, if you excuse me.
i'm not going to upload all of the pictures though but yeah. most of us were squinting because it was too bright and sunny. protect your eyes (and skin), lads.
so now, i don't know what should i do. well, i want to find a job but i don't know where to start. well, being introvert and socially awkward simultaneously are not the best combination, i suppose. i'm just that bad in talking with people. like seriously. i stutter a lot. i have literally 1% self-confidence, or 2.5% if i'm lucky. other than that, meh. i really wish i can be a blogger as my profession. or fangirl. because that's what i do best, not interacting with people in real life.
i think that is it. i don't have anything to say. so long and good night *sings Helena by MCR* hahah good byeeeeeeeeee xx
before i could scream to myself, i know. i haven't been posting for quite awhile. but that is because i am just lazy. no reason needed. haish. futhermore, i have a lot to tell just too hard to put it into words. i am still stuck with my short stories and all. i think i have to start over a new one. i am feeling a little bit fantasy inspired haha idk. but anyway, i went to Big Bad Wolf Book Sale last Tuesday i guess with my favourite little one {Amira Farain} hehe. first of all, it was a fun day. it was a real unexpected fun day. you know the day when you just plan what you are going to do but it turned out pretty awesome? yeah. THAT kind of day. big bad wolf was awesome. i wish i could go there again but i am quite broke at the moment so HAH till then, see you next year mr wolfy *wipes tears dramatically* hahaha but seriously. it was amazing. i bought FOUR books for RM30 only! How crazy is that? normally, i could get only one book for RM30. Big Bad Wolf saved my life as i haven't been buying new books lately. but yay!
we fangirled like crazy people might think we escaped from the asylum or something...
all because of books.
yep.
after that, we went to JBCC because we planned to eat dinner outside. so we walked around together. and then, we bumped into these guys...
a day full of ma faves awh hahahaha oh yeah Amira and I were wearing the same sweater hehehe #twinning4lyf. okay back to the topic hahaha, well we knew that the guys were there and i was kinda hoping that we would meet or what. then, as we were window shopping, suddenly they came up to us. i guess you can say i was surprise i nearly had a heart attack. how very dramatic of me. but really though.
after that, we talked for awhile and took selfie {obviously!} for a bit and thennnnnnn i met my cousin. see what i mean? favourite people. Amira and I then went to Bath & Body Works. like always, we fangirled a lot. we smelt almost everything in the shop before my cousin came in and told me to pick anything cheap hahaha so i picked the Mad About You fragrance mist. hahaha. she paid for it though. thanks kak nadiiii <3
we went to dinner before we went home hehe it was seriously such a fun day. thanks to ma favourite people! i looooooooove you guys so much <3 i smiled the whole through writing this blog post. even thinking about it makes me happy. idk sometimes the simplest thing in life can actually make you happy. so do whatever you want, you might create great memories with it, right? so, why not? ;)
at first, i wanted to make a challenge then i decided not to because i am not very dedicated lol. i didn't plan to make this blog post about this tv shows called Dance Moms, but then, i feel like i wanted to. i have seen this shows since season 1 but stopped at season 3 last year(?) because malaysia's lifetime has stopped showing them idk why. so i started to watch the season 4 back this past two days online. i finished it ni two days. yep. but i still don't have the chance to catch up on the new season. i have cried and laughed and be mad for this two days (which makes me realise that i have became more sensitive than before). so this show is about a group of girls who dance at ALDC (Abby Lee Dance Company) since they were toddlers. they went to a new competition every week and have to perform the dance routine that they learnt for within a week with some bunch of mamas dramas. and these are the original six;
from the left; Brooke Hyland, Mackenzie Ziegler, Maddie Ziegler, Chloe Lukasiak, Paige Hyland, and Nia Frazier.
so basically they are dancers with their own talents and capabilities. i really love all of them, it's hard to choose which one is my favourite. they are all amazing (seriously, i would kill to have any dancing skills, especially ballet). their dance routine has been taught by their dance teacher who is the owner of ALDC, Abby Miller. she did an amazing job with the routines. BUT she is a really tough cookie. Maddie Ziegler, has been her all time favourite. Abby keeps comparing Maddie with the other kids which is really bad because the last thing a child wants is to be compared to another kid. they have their own talents, capabilities, what they can do and what they can't do. i know she just wanted the best for them but comparing people to let the others down and telling them that what they do is not good enough isn't a great teaching method. she is mentally abusing them.
and there comes the second season. another girl had been brought into the team by an audition, Kendall Vertes.
every other season, kids come and go. but the most thing to highlight is during season 4. Abby brought another team with girls that she has chosen during the audition into ALDC. the girls have to compete with each other to prove which team deserves the place in ALDC. the ending is very heart breaking. enough with the Hylands quit ALDC, then Chloe and her mom, Christi, ended up leaving ALDC. even though Chloe won the highest score for ALDC (although she was in the fifth place, she is yet the highest between the three soloists), and even in the winning team, Abby wasn't really satisfied when Chloe beat Kamryn (a girl that she brought in the new team). Chloe even beat Kamryn twice, yet Abby still felt like Chloe didn't deserve to win. WHICH IS HEARTBREAKING BECAUSE CHLOE OVERHEARD WHAT ABBY SAID ABOUT HER TO CHLOE'S MOM.
i'm still really sad. because some of these kids are too young to handle this, they are so strong. for example Mackenzie who has always been compared to her sister Maddie a lot. i mean, she is Mackenzie and she will always be Mackenzie. she doesn't have to be Maddie to be great. seeing this kids getting hurt at such a young age is really hard. tbh, these girls are amazing in their own way. everything just seems to have fallen apart. the number of the member has been decreasing.
those are the ones that are left in the team. but i heard that Kalani (which is also a graceful dancer as they all are) will be in the team in season 5.
it hurts to see the friendships between them have grown apart. but this is just what the media has shown to us and what the media wants us to see. i hope they still do what they do. and be the best version of themselves.
this is just my opinion, but i don't think it matters because i'm not a dancer. i don't mean to offend anyone. okay. i feel like a creepy 17-year-old-girl who stalks them. hahaha i don't care. the fangirl life chooses me, i don't choose the fangirl life. or maybe i do...
in case you were wondering, yes, that Maddie is Maddie Ziegler who is featured as the dancer that potrays Sia when she was younger, in two of her music videos, Chandelier and Elastic Heart, which is really amazing. (please check it out!)
hello, dear people. to whom it may concern, today i'm going to talk about my favourite books of 2014. the one that i read in 2014, not the one that was published in 2014. i have chosen 10 books instead of 14 because.... it's so damn hard, really. i am blasting to my favourite ever song {strange - tokio hotel ft. kerli} while updating this blog. but they don't have strange in spotify which annoys me because i can't autoplay it. i have been listening to this song on repeat for the past few days. like seriously. also, i celebrated new year with watching suicide room {also my favourite movie}. because i have a life, duh? but today, i'm not going to talk about my favourite movie nor song. instead,i'm going to talk about my favourite books as i mentioned it earlier. but i won't be talking deeper about the plot kayyy. here's a little sneak peek of my favourite books of 2014.
so let's start with the 10th place.
10. Tape by Steven Camden.
okay. first and foremost, this book is very light-hearted. i love how the two characters are connected though it is not in the same generation. i love the 'romance' in this story because it's not very heavy. i don't really like romance book that much idk why. {which in this case, i love looking for alaska more than the fault in our stars} and i cried reading this book but not when i read the fault in our stars. yes. my emotion is weird.
9. Girl Online by Zoe Sugg.
i said that i'm going to do a review of this book but then i changed my mind. i think this is sorta overhyped book. but still it's good. it's not as good as i expected it to be. also, i've heard that this book is ghost-written which i don't know if it's true or not because when i read it, i feel connected to Zoe. the book is so her. i still love Zoe no matter what though. but i do like the concept of it. a blogging concept. she also did a great job putting anxiety into words. i like the characters, especially Elliot. he is really an amazing friend anybody could ask for! i wish i have him in real life though. he helped Penny so much, especially on the flight. but i really like this book. SO MUCH.
8. This Star Won't Go Out by Esther Grace Earl.
this is a non-fiction, a biography by a cancer patient. a story by a very strong girl indeed. unfortunately, she passed away. it's a story about her life being a cancer patient. reading it, i can feel the struggles and the pain. she was also an amazingly beautiful writer. it's a very heartfelt story. Esther Earl: this star won't go out.
7. Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell.
this. book. is. life. i am a fangirl so i can relate to the character so much. SO MUCH. i feel like i am Cath without the twin part. from the introvert version of herself to the ultimate fangirl. hahaha. also, levi is so freaking cute. i imagined Andrew Garfield as Levi ahhh <3 i can connect to the character so well.
6. The Beginning of Everything by Robyn Schneider.
i saw the book in Ingrid's favourite video. she featured the book in it. after that, i knew that i need to buy this book and read it. i instantly fell in love with this book. SO MUCH. it's beautifully written. the writing, the storylines, the ending. though the ending is kind of heartbreaking. my favourite part is the firework part. i almost cried when Ezra's dog was eaten by the coyote though.
5. The Girl Who Could Fly by Victoria Forester.
OKAY. THIS IS A MIDDLE GRADE BOOK BT WHATEVER. still this is the best middle grade book i have ever read. it's kinda like younger version of Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children, but i like this better. maybe because i read this before Miss Peregrine's. i find it way too deep for a middle grade. but for every words that i read, i fell in love with it, deeper and deeper.
4. 13 Reasons Why by Jay Asher.
this book hit me like a truck. this is my kind of book. i write stuff like this. i can give you 13 reasons {..or even more} reasons why to love this book. seriously though. it captured me in every way. if you read this book, don't forget to listen to the tape in Youtube. especially the last tape. i wasn't expecting that really.
3. Popular by Maya Van Wagenen.
okay. this is another non-fiction that i read this year. I LOVE IT. and this book is written by a 15-year-old girl. i cant even.... that's amazing. she's so lucky to have such an opportunity. she, too, is an amazing human being. i am amazed how can a 15-year-old girl do such thing. basically, it's about a girl who was a social outcast but then she found this book, which was written for about sixty years or so? i don't remember. anyways, the book is about how to be a popular. and she actually did {surprisingly} become popular by following what the book said. rules meant to be break sometimes. status quo doesn't mean anything anyways. believe in what you believe.
okay. here comes the first runner-up. *drum rolls* 2. Burn for Burn trilogy by Jenny Han & Siobhan Vivian. SURPRISE HAHAHA the trilogy is probably going to be the first if i didn't read Harry Potter last year {spoiler alert!}. it's well written. beautifully, indeed! the cliffhangers really killed me. i died too many times throughout finishing the trilogy. i even cried from the beginning to the end. almost entirely. i'm so in love with Reeve. i could've repeat the book if i hadn't had another book to read. seriously, amazing. round off applause to both of the incredible authors. you guys did such an amazing job. okay here comes the first place... 1. HARRY POTTER SERIES BY J. K ROWLING. what a surprise, really! whew. yes. to whom it may concern. i read the series for the first time last year. i seriously had abandoned the existence of it. and of course, constantly regretted it. {blame my mom. she said that Harry Potter is not a good movie}. but of course, the whole credit goes to J. K Rowling. i don't really have to tell much about the stories though. it's just MAGICAL. *raises wand* i have 4 pottermore accounts. and that is because i want to know if i actually belongs to the house i am in. the first one is hufflepuff. and after that, i got ravenclaw and slytherin. and the last one is, hufflepuff. so i guess i really am a hufflepuff. No Ragrets. hufflepuff's common room is near the kitchen okay. there is just no way that i'm going to be in gryffindor. but yeah. i couldn't describe into words how much i love, adore [inserts every words with the same meaning as admiration] this series. although i'm late. but you can never be too late, right? better late than never. yup yup. honestly, i would freak out about Harry Potter right now but i'm trying so hard to control myself. fangirl problems. potterhead problems, mostly. hahaha. so that's it. my top 10 favourite book. i hadn't read so many books last year. but still the most throughout 16 years of my life. i don't think i will ever read more this year. i have to focus on my studies first. but that doesn't mean i can't buy it though, am i right? ;) to whoever that reads, don't you ever stop. if any of you wondering {which in my case, there's probably not} what Carpe Librum means, it means seize the book. so go on, seize the book <3
“To put away aimlessness and weakness, and to begin to think with purpose, is to enter the ranks of those strong ones who only recognize failure as one of the pathways to attainment; who make all conditions serve them, and who think strongly, attempt fearlessly, and accomplish masterfully.”
- James Allen Quotes
Sometimes I wonder how people see me and what they think of me. It scares me a bit, honestly. I am sure though, that what they think of me,
what they think my life is, is a complete misperception. I have always tried to show myself as a carefree person, as someone who wont get bothered
because of public judgements. I am sure my friend and family think there is nothing going wrong in my life, that I do not worry enough, that
I am always happy. And I am sure they probably somewhat hate me for it because, lets admit it, there is nothing worse than seeing someone
who is life seems so perfect while yours is a complete mess. Truth is, I have become an expert at pretending. I think we are all experts
or at least we are getting there.
my sunshine
links exchanged opened! just tag me but link me first
